streams of uncertainity

wad i did on the 28th aug to 3rd sep

2006-09-03T14:15:00.000-07:00

well guys i juz gonna tell u wad i did during this week.. hahaha

28th aug

it was on monday that day, i woke up at 1:30pm. I knew that i was goin to be late. My class was having a chalet for 4 days 3 nights at aloha loyang. I was supposed to wake up at 10am to get things done fast so tat i wont be in a rush(kelamkabut) i everitym kancong wan haisss dono y... N den, sok hong called me at 12plus but during tat tym, i was still asleep hahaha!! quite bad ey? she missed called me several tym till i woke up.. haha
so i quickly shower n packed my bags n everithin.. she helped me to carry all the containers, radio, guitar.. n oh yar shafiq was dere wif her too. so the three of us took the bus n reach at pasir ris mrt stn n wait for the rest of the class. Soon it was goona be 3 plus n but still some of them r not dere... so we juz go on n check in at 3:30pm. After reachin at our chalet, i took a rest dere cos i didnt had enuf sleep while the rest went to the pool. We had fried rice for dinner wic my my brought frm home n guess wad?? since the class was all hungry, haha the food still did not finish.. haha (contradicting myself) ok stop it!! so afta dinner, as sum of u all noe, the dota freaks played dota lah ofcos!! haha kaiwen, dennis and dennis played till the nxt morning... haiyooo... as for me n shafiq, we played the guitar n we oso play jenga wif dem!!! haha play untill the security came juz to level down our noise... haha poor old uncle!! nvrmd.. den we went to slp at ard 5am... oh yar!!!! i omost forgot tat dae was my mum's 41 birthday!!! haha forgot to wish her!! sori sori..

29th aug

woke up at 1 plus... n i go back at home to take the food n stuffs.. reach home at 2 plus.. n i took my shower at home.. can u imagine?? frm chalet go home without havin my shower?? haha conferm i smell lyk pillow haha!! ok den took a nap before i go dere agn.. oh yar my mum cooked chicken curry for our dinner.. chao frm home at 3 plus and go back to pasir ris again... haisss sian sey frm yishun go back to pasir ris... haha anywae i lyk to travel so no complainss... den after reachin at whitesands, i hav to buy 10 loafs of bread for the chicken curry.. haha... im lyk an idiot u noe?? carry the heavy tarmos summore(big thermal cointainer) afta payin for the breads, carry the 10 loafs of bread n the tarmos hahaha!! can u imagine tat?? haha.. den called ananth to fetch me frm dere n drove his car to chalet.. lucky he was dere or else hav to carry lyk shit sei!! tat dae, we gonna hav a bbq... the food was all marinated but the thing is the stuff for bbqing is not dere!!! like charcoal, firestarter, grill etc.. one of my gud fren, Mr Tinesh is the one hu is responsible for all this things. haha!! summore he called and said tat he will be cummin late due to his job interview.. so at 5pm, went down to shengshiong at loyang point n buy all the bbq stuff n we bought sumore bbq food to add on more varieties.. With me n shafiq, carrying the stuffs n went back by cab.. finally we can start the bbq.. The main event!!!! ok lame...
wad we hav for dinner was : chicken curry with bread
bbq : marinated chicken
hotdogs
crabstick
potato
fishball
mashmallow

and so we had fun with the bbq with the main star(Tinesh) arrived at 9 plus.. haisss lucky he sae sori or else i whack him till his skin color become white!!! haha!!! juz kiddin!! waifen's n sarafeen's bf was dere at the chalet too... Mingli onli came for the bbq n den went back haisss... wasted man... but its ok la as long she had fun den the 2o bucks she paid is worth it. Afta bbqing, dere were still alot more chicken wic hav not finished.. haiss!! wasted.. haha.. so after tat, played the guitar as usual den mabok came n planned to tagak(drink la) so shared money wif ananth, shafik, tinesh, dennis, dennis, mabok's frens n kaiwen.. haha!! bought liqour king robert frm pasir ris drive6 7 eleven.. we oso bought absolute vodka among our class since its not enuf to make us high.. so afta drank 3 shots each of king robert mixed wif coke, i can still walk la.. haha!! the taste of it, is rilli rilli suck sey!!.. afta mabok n his frens left, we quietly drank vodka la.. drank about 4 shots still not high yet.. den we buy 2 more bottles again, ananth, subha tinesh, shafik, dennis n me walk all the way frm chalet to buy the drink wher we bought.. haha!! tis tym, we bought, heaven n hills dry gin and bacardi.. while walkin back to chalet, i can feel tat im swinging seh.. haha shiok sei.. and so we drank again, with 5 shots of dry gin and another 5 shots of bacardi... afta tat, as u all noe, i was totally drunk!! haha!! they told me that i was so gila gila!! haha.. lucky they nvr took video of me sia!! or else im dead.. i cant walk properly, i wanted to walk straight but den i falled half way... haha!!! they told me i talked nonsense la lyke, "dun tell my mummy cos im drunk ok?" hahaha!!!! can u imagine 4 types of liqour n i drank abt total of 17 shots altogether.. haha!! ananth n me was drunk real bad haha!! he cant even walk as well.. he slept on the bench while i kip sittin down talkin to myself...hehe.. so......

30th aug

oh yar n so, at abt 6am in the mornin, we went to the beach and watch the sunrise.. i was abit drunk but i can walk properly.. hehe.. but too bad, we didnt saw the sunrise cos we were at the wrong side of the beach.. quite stupid of us haha!! so den we went to hav a swim at the freezin pool!! haha!! played water polo la n juz swimmin ard, den i went to the jacuzzi n slept dere.. haha!! i was rilli tireed uh tat tym.. at abt 12 plus, go back to chalet n i straight jump into bed, n slept for a few hours before i goin back to home to take food again.. it was about 3plus wen i woke up... i was feelin abit better but den i got headaches n my tummy was not dat good either due to the effect of drinkin.. haahaa.. before i leave, i ate oreo, maggie n den i straight away left to home, it was abt to rain dat tym, so i juz quickly walked frm the chalet all the way to the bus interchange.. haha far ryt? it was veri cold n the bus was oso freezin to the max man... bbrrrr!!! so reached home at 4 and took my warm shower n i slept for a few hours on my precious lovely bed(so long nvr slp on it sia)haha.. woke up at about 6 plus and by the tym i woke up, it was raining heavily.. walauwei!! so sian.. boohoo!! the food was oredi cooked(nasi lemak) but the problem is tat, i cant go cos its raining.. so i called my dad, n ask him to send me dere.. lucky he went back home early or else, hav to go dere alone n surely get wet!! so my dad n i went out home at 7:30pm and surprisingly my mum also followed.. haiss.. my dad told me, "mak kau nie suke nah nak kluar" haha.. afta reachin dere oredi, i saw jiaxin cookin some sidedishes for dinner.. there were french fries, chiken nuggets, eggs, n chicken again! so all of us eat hapily!! yeayy!! ok lame AGAIN! since it was the last nite, we planned to go to changi village n see bapoks haha!! ananth drove us(jiaxin, me, dennis, dennis, randy, subha, tinesh, shafiqn sarafeen) dere.. haha!! the rest didnt follow cos the car not enuf space. (stupid english) ok so it was 2am n we saw a couple of bapoks walkin ard at the carparks.. n it rilli turn me off wen i see them.. yucks!! still we dare to take pictures of them haha!! rilli looked lyk gal!! so we went down to changi beach and took a walk ard dere, its quite scary oso uh.. at first, we tot of goin to old changi hospital, but the gals were all scared so we decide to go changi airport!! hahaha!!! can u imagine goin dere wearing bermudas, slippers n tshirts n we all smell lyk shit!!?? haha! so parked the car at the carparked and walk into the airport n watch the aeroplane at the viewing mall!! haha cool!! it was 4am in the mornin, n we still wondering ard the airport.. haha we saw ppl slpin at the airport disturb dem la n slackin down dere.. so we off to the coffeeshop at drive6 again.. we hav sum refreshments downdere till 5am.. dennis, dennis, jiaxin n randy were all doze off oredi so we get back to the chalet with ananth speeding his car all the way dere.. mad driver! haha but it was so cool man... he can still speed up wen wen turnin his car and i can feel the tyres skidded on the road... hmm a honda oddesy(spacewagon car) SFS2850 D.. cool!! den the rest wen to slp afta reachin at the chalet but for me, ananth, subha, tinesh, sarafeen and shafik wen down near to the pool n play true or dare.. haha!! played till about 630am n we went back to chalet again.. i n shafik n had to leave early cos he got to went back to his sec skool for teachers dae performance whereas for me i nid to go to sec skool to mit my teachers.. but eventually i didnt go la.. haha!! before i left the chalet, i had a short speech to my class.. n it was quite a swit one n dey were all lyk applauding me for the food n everithin.. hehe thank god they rilli feel satisfied wif the food!! so...

31st aug

yeayy its malaysia's independent's day!!! woohhoo!!! cut it out khairi! ok so frm the chalet, i n shafik took 39 to yishun n guess wad??? is saw my old pri sch frens!! so long nvr see dem but dey didnt recognise me uh!! haiss.. its okie la... so shafik alight first before me n i thank him for helpin me out wif the bbq n everithin.. so afta reachin home, get my shower, n guess wad did i do next? SLEEP lah ofcos!!! i tot of goin back to sec skool but too tired uh!! hhaaha!! so slp frm 730am to 8pm haha!! den wen online, n chat wif lisa all the way till late.. miss her so much uh!! hehe... check my mails n everithin....bla bla blah..

1st sep

if im not wrong, i woke up at 12 cos tat mabok call me ask me to go to east coast pit.. haiss go out again... so woke up n took my shower, n mit him at wdld interchange at 3pm.. suppose to go to mosque cos got friday prayers but nvr go haha!! so we took bus 966 n den walk all the way to east coast n mit my frens dere.. after reachin dere, saw dem bbqin n straight away eat la!! was so hungry man tat tym..so i ate chicken wings, drums, prawns, fishball(again) till at abt 12 plus, den its tym for us to whack syed cos it was his 18th birthdae.. as usual dey drink n drink n drink again!! haha!! i tot i had enuf of drinkin liqour but den, dey call me to drink n so i drank absolute vodka.. after drinkin a sip, i threw it up cos i cant rilli take it... so i gave to afiq n he drank it all up... the guys were all drunk n they r like mad dogs.. haha!! i tink i will not be drinkin animore!!bluek!! so after tat afiq share his problems with me about his relationship with this school girl of his.. Tangy was her name.. nice!! haha.. feel so sad for him but i gave some advice on him and so we talk all the way till 530am.. talk talk talk at the beach hahaha romantic sia!!! ok stop it!! i slept for awhile, den sum of them decide to go back oredi so i followed dem, sleep on the bus till i get home... den finally i sleep again afta reachin home.... haha tiring man....

those ppl hu were at the pit: khairul, mabok, syed, fazcine, fazekor and his gf, afiq, aidil, fauzie(faggot), kid, arab, hafiz, moksen, giant, sid, aidil, sum of the 211 family n 201 family..

2nd sep

afta reachin home sleep all the way at 8am n woke up again at 6pm cos nid to follow my parents to my makcik house got kenduri la... haisss... den reach home play my guitar for awhile den go n sleep... tiring tiring!! haha!! nothin much i guess... continue again.......

3rd sep

woke up at 12.. early ryt? haha cos my dad woke me up!!! haisss yawns... he cooked fish soup la n ask me to try it... so afta eat oredi slp back again and slp till 5pm.. quickly get dressed up to masjid.... haha!!! can u imagine?
drink drink but still go to mosque? haha!!! eat alot oso!! satay, curry puffs, popiahs, longans, bananas n mee hoon..haha eat till im damn bloody fulll!!! haha!!! so went back at 1130pm... slp again... den woke up at 4am n i saw my dearest lisa still online.. chat wif her n ask her to send the cardigans song wic she rilli lyk!! haha!! ok finally im done typing my longest entry ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahaa!!! since i seldom blog, so i type a long one juz to payback... haha n i took type this entry from 4am to 11am!!! haha!!! here u go peeps!!!!

end

khairi is not gay!

2006-08-21T10:17:00.000-07:00

Hey there frenss.. it has such been a long tym i hav not update my blog... i noe sum of u guys out dere must be wasting ur time lookin thru my unupdate blog recently ryt???? n u all tot it is update... khairi is a fool!! i noe i noe..hehe... im really really sorri..

k let me start...

well skool is gonna end in 2 more days n still i hav not yet prepared for the chalet food. Oh gossshhh!!! wat to do wat to do!! arrgghh!!! muz buy chicken wings, hotdogs, containers, breads and alot more in my 'to do list'.. But i tink its gonna be juz fine on the day itself... hopefully!!! aniwae, recentli, my class(w26p) took pictures on the 18th of august.. here are some of the photos we took...

oh shhittt!!!! wads wrong wif tis blog!!! i cant upload the pics!!! nvermind i try again asap!!! gtg!!

moshpit vol 1

2006-07-30T03:31:00.000-07:00

going home...
haha!!
brack n wrhite

my cap is abit slanted eh?
....
my set..
oh my god!!!! axeizan from mulysa!! their band rawk!!!!!!

he is ready to get kicked!!!

Down Days..

2006-07-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

these few days, i m not myself anymore.. Afta celebratin my birhday, i change alot. like im gettin more n more sensitive and i dunno y.. izzit bcos of my horoscope takin place?? or maybe izzit sumone hu i miss 'her' alot?? ive been thinkin too much la.. in class, im quiet, i didnt do much discussions with my team and my performance has juz drastically drop down.. i blocked alot people in my msn n i dun feel lyk talkin to dem... is not bcos dey have against sumthin on me but i cant talk to them. i simply nid a break juz to cool myself down down at tis moment.. sorry guys.. ryt now, i can onlii talk to hida cos shes comfortable to talk wif n she noes how i feel. btw im not emoing..

i noe im too much.. i ve made ppl fedup of me bcos of my stupidity especially for nana.. it hapen wen my class were all hapily playing games at Huimin's neighbourhood in wdlds.. we were all playin soccer wen i made her angry till she uses her sweater n beat me up.. i noe she was rilli pissed off by my stupidity. so from dere, i finally decided to kip my mouth shut. n den did not talk to her ever since.. i told her i nid a break n den i blocked her.. sorry.. my mind has been surrounded by so many problems.. oh god pls pls help me to ease this problems of mine..

recently, ive dress up nerdy, wic wat i wanted too. n i noe how it feels lyk being nerd. ppl see me laughed, makin fun of me and so on.. wearing nerdy specs, hair-combed flat sideways, buttonup shirts n carryin a haversack bag. it rilli feels embarasing wen u being laugh at. but i dun mind i nid a change in my look. its abt me being different. a change in appearance, behaviour n attitude..

So i tink being nerd n quiet is wad im goin to be at tis moment.

I know what is inside my heart

2006-06-05T00:10:00.000-07:00

When seeking help in matters of the heart I find it best to only search within you. Others have the best intentions when helping you but their views are clouded either by feelings for you or by past experiences.

Only you know the whole story, you know the feelings behind your loves motives and what she truly feels. Listening to other may help you make your decision but you should just take what they say with a grain of salt because you know what you want to do from the get go. If you feel you know something is true, don't let others change that thought.

This past week has been hell on earth for me. I thank everyone who gave advice and such, but I know my love better than she knows herself sometimes. I understand what she wants, and I know what I want. I guess I wish that someone else could understand me?? The only person I’d want to hold close to me is gone, and I don't know when she will come back.

I can't discuss my feelings with anyone because they will tell me “just forget her and move on, she only treated you bad”. The good times out weigh the bad times a hundred fold. I thought I had learned my lesson about seeking advice from outside sources but I guess not. I'm the only one who knows what I’m feeling and what she is feeling. Anything I’ve been told has only made things worse.

I'm fighting my inner desire to be the sweetest person she knows and doing everything in my power to get her back now, but I know it's not the best thing to do. I feel bad in talking to other women sometimes because I don't want to do something that leads them to believe I care about them. I truly don't, my heart belongs to someone now. Until she forsakes everything about us, that’s how it has to be. She's worth too much to me to risk losing her completely.

We love each other. I know this. I also know that we will be together in the future, because despite every disagreement and rarely seeing each other we've had we still come out together. We never gave up on each other. Even though we are on a "break" I know if something bad happened to me I could call her and she would be my support.
.......*sigh*

monday

2006-05-31T08:22:00.000-07:00

i dunno why i am so lazy to update my blog... haiz...
guess im not a blogger...
i suck!!

The Person who i admire..... MY MOM

2006-05-13T00:20:00.000-07:00

14.5.2006

The name is Sabrina Sadli who i realli admire the most.. Tomorrow will be Mothers day.. We will be juz celebrating at home and i think we will not be goin out and eat at any fancy restaurant. Mother's day does not mean to hav expensive presents, jewelleries or fancy restaurants the important thing is tat we shud show our love towards her and that will make her happy.. She is such a strong women who brings up 4 kids and watch them grow... She is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts. The mother loves her child most divinely, not when she surrounds him with comfort and anticipates his wants, but when she resolutely holds him to the highest standards and is content with nothing less than his best.

My mom i love u the most.......................

The Making of 211

2006-05-12T23:32:00.000-07:00

12.5.2006

This band was started recently. It is a 6 piece band which consists of Hafiz(scream), Joe(vox), Khairi(lead), Afik(rythm), Fifi(bass) and Zac(drums). For your info, this is my side band. Ya... So i will be performing a gig with this band on the 10 of June which is called "punkrock vs metal" gig. We are still unsure of what songs are we going to play for the gig. hmmx....

Anyway, here are some of the pics we took tat dae....

yea tats all i have for 211.....

skool frens

2006-04-22T04:20:00.000-07:00

Haha Sori peeps!!! i nvr update my blog

aniwae, i meet alot of new frens in RP.. Dont feel lyk an alien animore..
hahaha.. they are all my frens diannah, denniz and jojo.. oh yar the top pic is mabok my ryhtmist.

Torn Within Me

2006-04-12T07:11:00.000-07:00

Exhausted beyond repair, Stripped of all I had, Forced to die inside, Now I breathe a renewed Life, I is now I see without my eyes, If this is what it takes, To bring me to my knees, Then feed me pain until, I realize I am but a slave, Remind me of my need for You, Remind me of who I am......

silence.......

Through this pain I refine, Tearing me from within, Screaming to be released but held fast by Your love, Hold me here, Break me until my face breathes upon this ground, Outstretched with my head to the floor, Spent of all my strength

Relying on Yours.........................

First Day Of Skool.....

2006-04-11T06:50:00.000-07:00

Gosh!!!! wad a dae it was... i feel lyk an alien in tat class man.... ive onli knew ili and khairil mabok... yea i noe its juz the first day of skool.... but will try my best to interact, communicate and make new frens...

Battle of the band

2006-03-31T10:52:00.000-08:00

on this sunday,2nd of april, my band is havin a gig... it was a last minute decision... but finally the band agree to perform. the gig is call battle of the band... it was organise by musiczone... it will be held at bukit batok cc... do watch us perform... tickets r sellin at $2 at the door.. cya...

2006-03-30T07:52:00.001-08:00

2006-03-30T07:52:00.000-08:00

lamb of god

truth of my perception

2006-03-28T22:18:00.000-08:00

the begining of my perception.............

in silence i wait for what is real. for so long i have felt alone. how can i bear this any longer??
i'm dying inside, take me away, take me away...
sight given to these blind eyes. arms stretched out only to hold separation.
is this the way u treated me?? what is love without sacrifice...?
drain me of my very essence to form again what lasts.

how quickly i forget that this is meaningless...................................